Tuesday, December 11, 2007

The Book of Tights


I might have to channel my frustration like this:

And there arrived a letter in the Inbox,
And the letter told of a spectacular offer on nice new Castelli tights,

And the tights were closeout 2006


So the people rejoiced


And the people pounced on the offer,

And they filled out their check right away,

And they mailed their order the next day


So the people waited


And they waited six holy nights and six holy days,

And the people's housemate returned with the letter,

And it had merely fallen out of the mailbox into a bush


So the people steeled their nerves and tried again


And the letter with the check was again placed in the mailbox

And the mailman came

And again, the order was placed


So again, the people waited

And they waited six holy nights and six holy days

And the letter was FUCKING RETURNED TO SENDER???

And they just couldn't believe this shit
!!!

So the people cursed at the sky, and tore at their hair, and once again re-mailed that goddam letter


And the people hated snail mail all the more
And the question was asked: "what's it take to get my goddam tights?"

And there was only silence

Because there was no answer

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