Monday, May 30, 2011

Yowzers

A few snapshots from the day.

*While we were getting ready, some kid came up and asked me to sign his card. I said of course, only his card was the official Jelly Belly Pro Cycling Team promotional card. I didn't want to sign another pro team's card, so I asked him if I could sign his shirt instead. He said sure. 

*I spied Jonny Sundt while waiting for the race to start, and rolled over to say hello. I hadn't seen Jonny in years, and as to be expected, the first words out of his mouth were extremely lewd. I wouldn't DREAM of repeating what he said on my blog, but just know they involved his recently severed (and re-attached) finger, and my mother. Nobody within earshot was surprised. 

*It was the heat that got me, more than anything else. I just spent the last two weeks in Seattle, where it was so cold I didn't dare leave the house without my winter coat. I've done exactly one other race this year with temperatures over 85 degrees (Stage 1 of Redlands, back in March), and today was much hotter and MUCH more humid. When I got back to the van, every surface exposed to the sun was extremely hot to the touch (light-posts, the ground, and the van itself). I think today is what they call a real "slobberknocker." 

*I'm glad Quinn made the breakaway instead of me. There's a Quinn's-eye-view account here

*On the third lap, on the approach to Paris Mountain, I knew I was fucked. I wasn't going to make it over the next climb. 
I came up behind Matt and asked him "hey Matt, are you having fun?" 
"I don't know man"
"Yes, you're having fun -- this is fun, remember?" 
"You're right Sam," he conceded, "this is fun." 
It's easy to forget when we're suffering, and hot, and dehydrated, and (in Matt's case) crashed earlier in the race, but mostly, we do this for fun. 

*I arrived at the top of Paris Mountain for the third time half an hour after the race leader. I reached the crest and got off my bike. Dozens of spectators, and at least six other blown racers milled about. Techno music blared from some pretty large speakers. Someone asked me if I wanted any water. "No thanks," I said, "but do you think I could sit on top of your cooler for a little while?" I didn't want to fall over, I felt like vomiting, and I certainly wasn't ready to pedal my bike any more. Sitting seemed wise. I sat on a cooler with a bunch of teenage cycling fans for twenty minutes, and talked about the race. We talked about racing, and talked about the beastly heat. Then I rinsed the grime off my legs, arms, and face, and got back on my bike. 

*I found possibly the best video for this blog in the world: 


*The sprint for the win was awesome! Busche came around the final corner sprinting, and Hincapie easily came around him. How he got himself on that wheel, and then how he summoned the energy to throw his bike at the line is totally beyond me. That kid totally outfoxed a fox!

*I hope I come back to this race. I like it. 

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Full-Blown Stupid

My day in pictures. Let me start with a brief setup.


The organizers of US Pro graciously gave us a day off in between the two events, so today we had the opportunity for a leisurely morning, followed by a nice little ride. We planned on riding a loop of the road race course, including a trip up Paris Mountain (the very difficult climb we shall go up four times tomorrow). We all packed our bags, loaded our bikes and piled in the van. I grabbed what I thought were my bike shoes, but upon arrival, I discovered these instead: 
Oh you've got to be kidding me. Yes, those would be my freshly polished Nike sneakers. I'd left my Bonts at home. 
This meant I drove sag instead of riding the course. 
 Something I was NOT happy about:
I got to see the (very hard looking) climb. 

And the circuit down in town....from the driver's seat of the van.  
Once everyone was done riding, I parked the van to let everyone change. I was very upset. 
So I bought a coffee. 
And felt better. 
Then I wandered off and took artistic photos of Falls Park on the Reedy
And the splendid suspension bridge that offers an unobstructed view of those falls. 
Then I saw a sign that made it all make sense (click to enlarge): 
Finally we returned to the house, and I went for a ride of my own, and encountered a snake. He was alive, but I feared he wouldn't stay that way for long. I wanted to get him off the road, but since he was also very large and black, I feared he would ATTACK ME IN THE THROAT! I'm no honey badger (what with their immunity to cobra venom), so I tried to get him to move by throwing gravel and yelling. 
video
And eventually, I successfully convinced the snake to slither off into the bushes. 
video

Management Might Have to Step In Here...

So yesterday I revealed the awesome Donkey Kong talent possessed by my teammates Kai and Quinn. Well the management caught wind of their exploits, and decided to lay down the law. Enter Remi and Tad. These guys are established, world-renowned grandmasters of Donkey Kong, the true Old Guard of the game. Watch and learn, young Jedi. First off, Remi demonstrates proper technique. Standing is for suckers:

Clearly sitting on the back of a chair provides the best elbow-to-knee contact. This position can be enhanced even more with the presence of a cushion:

Remi clobbered several of Kai's high scores into oblivion (read: out of the top five). With every slain Mario, Remi demonstrated how serious of a competitor he is. He howled in displeasure -- cursing the wretched Kong and his dastardly barrels, and threatening to punch the glass screen straight through, bare-handed! Only once Remi's scores had coated the leaderboard did Tad sit down to the controls. The duel was every bit as intense as those epic matches at Funland in the Kong of Kong documentary. See Tad, the grand old general himself, at work:
Remi watches in disgust as Tad racks up points. 
The ultimate champion of Donkey Kong has yet to be crowned, but just know that the competition is hotting up out here at Team Exergy's US Pro headquarters.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

...And Then Reality Sets In

The internet is crazy. It allows such a multi-dimensional platform for analyzing an event. Let's

So the US Pro TT didn't go quite how I'd hoped. Here are some results (Even though there were only 34 starters, I'd still recommend starting from the bottom of the page). Here's a brief summary, in Gchat form:


me:  holy shit
bottom 5
wasn't expecting that
 Lang:  howd it feel out there?
 me:  hot
and slow
It's like the last two weeks of narrow victories over regional fields were just to puff up my pride a bit....
...so that I could be all-the-more effectively reminded where I actually sit in the big scheme of things.


To be fair, I had a pretty bad race, and I didn't feel anywhere near as good as I did the previous two weeks, but still -- there's nothing like losing over four minutes in a time trial to make a man look at the heavens and wonder "how on earth do those monsters go so fast?!" I remember the first time I lost 4+ minutes in a TT, and the feeling hasn't changed much.

Here's a way to visualize what I did:

Aaand here's a way to visualize HOW I did:

I've analyzed the results, and concluded that riders with last names that end in a "Z" go really really fast (i.e. Zabriski and Zirbel). Therefore, my caveman alter-ego Krogg has decided to undergo a little name change. I'll let him tell you about it:

So Krogg no go fast at Pro Nats. This make Krogg wear sour frown all van ride home. Teammates prod Krogg: "Why you no talk Krogg? Why you no say asinine things like normal van ride home?"  Well Krogg tell you why: KROGG WANT GO FASTER! Krogg look at first place caveman -- Zabriskie. Krogg look at second place caveman -- Zirbel. That settle it. Z's go faster! Krogg come up with elegant solution to complicated problem: change name to Zrogg! That right! From now on, Zrogg have blazing, ungodly fast TT! Zrogg can't miss podium!!! (Unless Scott Zwizanski get better, in which case Zrogg might place fourth, which still ain't bad.) Zrogg test theory at next time trial. Until then.....


OK I'LL STOP. I'm not actually that bummed. It would have been great to have a better ride, but honestly, Monday's race is what it's all about -- and in that I think I can be pretty helpful over Paris Mountain. To quote my team director, the ever-clever Tad Hamilton "It's just a bike race!"

It's ON Like Donkey Kong

AWH YEAH. IT'S ON LIKE DONKEY KONG!!!

...literally.

Yes, we have a fully functional Donkey Kong/Centipede arcade game in our home stay. The best part? WE DON'T EVEN HAVE TO PUT IN QUARTERS! Personally, I love video documentaries about strange groups of highly nerdy, and highly obsessed people (remember my tribute to AFOL last year?), and classic arcade game enthusiasts are no exception. For those of you who haven't seen King of Kong, it's high time you got yourself to your local streaming Netflix contraption. Here's a sample:

With a cast of characters so nerdy, and so obsessed they have to be seen to believed, King of Kong is both really interesting, and really sad. Interesting because you never knew people like that actually existed, and sad because, well, people like that actually exist! Take Billy Mitchell -- gaming legend, salsa legend (the sauce, not the dance), and as big a megalomaniac as ever existed in any sport/game/nerdy obsession.
Or Steve Wiebe --  unemployed teacher, negligent father, and totally distracted husband, all because he happens to be a friggin' genius at Donkey Kong.

I'd highly recommend watching King of Kong, but as engrossing as that movie is, and as talented as its players are, they're nothing for what's about to hit the classic arcade world. Watch out Billy and Steve -- your high-scores are soon to move down a few notches. Why? Because Team Exergy has joined the fray! Behold, Donkey Kong virtuoso Quinn "QURUSHER" Keogh:
Quinn spent roughly four minutes playing Donkey Kong. He failed to get to the second level. He got bored and pulled the plug before giving it a second try -- but that's the point -- QUINN MASTERED THE GAME IN FOUR MINUTES!!! He saw through the complexity of the game like a cat sees through the night.

Or elegant master of Centipede, Kai "Killer Whale" Applequist:
Kai actually played for close to twenty minutes, and set several of the high scores on this particular Centipede unit. Likewise, Kai needed but a brief introduction to the game to achieve total and complete mastery. This isn't to scoff at the past legends of this hallowed sport/game/nerdy obsession, but rather to point out how stupendously talented these two players are. Both Quinn and Kai are the once-in-a-generation kind of genius -- which means there's a generation out there that's missing its genius. Huzzuh Quinn and Kai -- I eagerly look forward to seeing your name in the record books!

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Chateau Exergy

Well our airplane-based travel adventure is over. We made it to the great state of South Carolina, and I even got to visit some family in Chicago last night. We stayed with my aunt, who lives just north of the city. I got to see my cousins for the first time in years, and my how they've grown -- the boys (Jake and Cody, who last I checked were small enough to easily wrestle at the same time), have grown into hulking mounds of muscle who could easily injure their fragile pro cyclist cousin is they wanted. Alexandra got her braces off and looks gorgeous. Staying with my aunt was works better than sleeping on a route of seats at the airport, plus after a day filled with security lines and layovers, a deep dish pizza, a beer, and a soak in the hot tub was exactly what we needed.

Today was sort of like a repeat of yesterday, only everything went slightly better: we woke up early (but not as early), out flight was delayed (but not for as long), and the we drive to or house. We have rented a house in a retirement community, and holy housing crisis, this thing is big, and filled with toys.








Wednesday, May 25, 2011

NEW THINGS!!!

Here are some things that I've either done, or will do soon, that are NEW!

NEW RACES: can I get a "U"? Can I get an "S"? Can I get a "U.S. PRO"??? Hell yeah. After 6 years of going to "nationals" I'm finally going to Nationals. The real one. The USA Cycling Pro Championships are held in Greenville, South Carolina  -- which, come to think of it, is a NEW STATE for me! For the last several years, US Pro has been held at the very end of September. This year they placed it right after the Tour of California. This could be good or it could be bad for Team Exergy: either the guys who just did Cali will be really tired, or really fast. I've got my fingers crossed for then being tired.

NEW AIRLINE WOES: wow. I've never had an airline bend me over so bad. Our flight out to Greenville, SC was supposed to go like this: Boise --> Denver --> Chicago --> Greenville. But due to thunderstorms, they called last night to inform us that the final leg of our flight (Chicago --> Greenville) has been cancelled. They kindly rebooked us on a flight departing the next morning. They did not, however, rebook the first two legs of our flight. See where I'm headed here? This left us with *ahem* A ~20 HOUR LAYOVER IN CHICAGO. Not only that, they still charged us for our bags, wouldn't hook us up with a free hotel room, or a flight voucher, or even a free gin and tonic on the flight (not that I wanted a gin and tonic at 6AM -- but it's the principal dammit). Not only that, they had to change the hydraulic fluid on the plane, then THEY BROKE THE PART AND LEAKED THE FLUID AND HAD TO GO BACK TO THE GATE TO FIX IT AGAIN AND WE LEFT TWO HOURS LATE AND WE MISSED OUR CONNECTION AND THEY STILL WOULDN'T GIVE ME A FREE GIN and TONIC AND NOW WE'RE SUCK IN DENVER WAITING FOR WHAT MIGHT DAYS ON END!
Jiminy Christmas. United used to be the cyclists' airline. Free bike vouchers used to come with every USA Cycling license. There was a little stand that sold cycling crap in the United terminal at the Denver airport. Oh how things have changes United. Cyclists of the world: fly Southwest. Fly Frontier. Fly friggin' Virgin Galactic for all I care. Speaking of Virgin Galactic, here's the little spaceship in action:


Space flight for the masses, coming right up.

NEW SHOE EXPERIENCE: I got my shoes shined. Yes, my Nike sneakers aren't exactly the kind of shoes you typically take to a shoe shine, but WHATEVER -- I WANTED TO SEE THOSE BABIES SPARKLE! Plus I was bored out of my mind and it looked kind of fun, what with those tall chairs and fancy foot rests. It looked kind of like a ride, or at least the closest thing I was going to get to ride in the airport -- cuz LORD KNOWS I WON'T BE RIDING A GODDAM AIRPLANE TODAY!

GO GO GO! Finally. They're boarding my flight.

Monday, May 23, 2011

WE WON THE CLAW!!!!!

Awh yeah. We held them off, and kept the top two spots on the podium. Quinn first, Kai second. I personally had to sacrifice my third place overall to keep the race stitched together, but it was well worth it. With only three guys in the race, we had a hard time covering the initial flurry of attacks. Eventually I decided to just ride a steady pace at the front, and keep Kai and Quinn out of the wind until the climbs. It worked. Nice work Team Exergy.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

A Very Full Day

Hot diggity dog! I won the TT. My teammates finished 2nd (Quinn) and 4th (Kai). Nice work Team Exergy. 
I was awarded this very cool leaders jersey (note the fully-compliant pin-job), but I barely hung on to the crit, and ultimately conceded 9 seconds to the front group. Thus my jersey fell from my shoulders to those of my teammate Quinn. For today's 85 mile road race, Team Exergy is placed 1st, 2nd, and 3rd overall (I know, right?). Hanging on to the whole podium with only three guys in the race will be pretty hard, but the beauty of our situation is that any one of us can go up the road and Team Exergy still wins the overall.  See full results here. 

Friday, May 20, 2011

THE CLAW!!!

ALLLLLRIIIIIGHT! HEEEEERE COMES THE CLAW!!!!!
I don't know who this guy is, but BE AFRAID OF THE CLAW!

You'll all remember THE CLAW don't you? WELL YOU SHOULD!

You should because THE CLAW is awesome!

IT'S GOT A TIME TRIAL!
AND A CRIT!
AND A ROAD RACE!


And officials so strict they felt the need to pre-empt any nonsense regarding race numbers. And I quote from an e-mail all the racers received tonight, the eve of the TT:

1. Riders will be assessed time penalties for improper placement of numbers or not having both numbers and frame number displayed (numbers may not be folded, trimmed, crumpled, or otherwise defaced). The first incident is an automatic 20 second time penalty, second incident will have additional time added on to the 20 second penalty.

GOT THAT? NO FOLDING! NO CRUMPLING!  BOTH NUMBERS! FRAME NUMBER TOO! PENALTIES GALORE!!!!!! Clearly in the spirit of the radio-banning, TT-bike-rule-inventing, no-fun-shall-be-had-at-a-bike-race UCI that we all know and love. I'm sorry -- while I don't agree that three, unfolded numbers are necessary for a time trial, I understand how that argument could be made -- but honestly, warning us not to crumple our numbers is utterly ridiculous!

Which brings me to tonight's confession (tomorrow is the rapture after all).

Seeing as how today was a good day for cyclists to admit things (--cough--Hincapie!)....I might as well get something off my chest.  Honestly, I feel somewhat responsible for throwing fuel to the number placement fire, fanning the flames of the ever-escalating police state of numbers at the Mutual of Enumclaw Stage Race. I actually caused quite a stink last year with my heinous violation of the "no number folding" rule. It's true. I folded my numbers when I took to the line at last year's Enumclaw TT. I was caught, and punished right there. Time was added to my result. I sobbed and sulked, and begged for forgiveness. "I'm a changed man," I pleaded, "I'll never fold numbers again!" But the officials heard none of it, and held their ground. I was so overwhelmed with the reality of my crime (I really am a bad person, I thought to myself), the only thing I could think of to make things right was storm off the front of the race the next day and win the overall. And that's exactly what I did.

So here we are, one year later. The number police are even more serious than last year. They will be on the look out for violators, and my guess is that they'll punish early, and punish often, and punish severely so as to set an example. I really don't want be that example. It's tough times like these that I look to Floyd for what to do. When I was struggling with my guilty conscience, Floyd showed me the way. When I was struggling up the climb at the Cascade Classic, Floyd showed me what to eat. And when I struggle with silly rules, Floyd shows me what to wear.
 

The Real Houseboats of Seattle

There are totally real houseboats of Seattle! I got to do some work on one for a friend of mine, and snapped some photos. Enjoy:








Thursday, May 19, 2011

BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!

Well, I've gone and done it: I applied to graduate school -- and not only that, I've been accepted! This Fall, I'm going to start the MBA program at Boise State's College of Business and Economics. I've been inspired by other cyclist/students who have shown that it is indeed possible to manage their professional racing career while simultaneously pursuing higher education. It's not the most prestigious MBA in the world, but Boise State has a lot going for it: it's a good program, it's located in Boise (which is where I want to be), and it's very reasonably priced. Getting a business degree will prepare me well for my post-racing career. Not to scoff at my Whitman education, but my studio art degree hasn't exactly been paying my bills. Now let me be clear: I'm not doing this to detract from my racing career at all -- in fact the opposite. By nature I'm not the most structured person in the world. If left to my own devices, I've been known to fritter away my days making coffee, watching the Giro on TV, and updating my blog (exhibit A). I am really excited to get back into an academic environment again -- not just because I like learning, but also because I think school serves as an excellent tool for extracting the most from my time. I believe I will prepare better for my 2012 racing season in school than not. An un-structured off-season can be a dangerous thing indeed, so business school it is, and the structure it brings with it.




TRANSLATION BY KROGG: 

KROGG GO TO BUSINESS SCHOOL! Krogg inspired by other caveman who race bikes and go to school. Adrian do it, why not Krogg? Also, Krogg draw huge inspiration from Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer: 
For those not familiar, Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer brilliant courtroom bravado now famous throughout legal world. See here: 


Krogg very excited to start school -- why? Because KROGG WANT LEARN! 

Wenatchee

Let's write a little about Wenatchee, shall we?

For this post, I'd like to write about the Tour of Wenatchee from the perspective of my Smith Optics Pivlock sun glasses. It was a good race for me (I won the TT, took second in the road race, and won the overall omnium), but it was awful for my sunglasses -- they hardly saw any action at all. Hear about it from the source: 

For the record, my sunglasses speak with a thick pirate/Scottish accent. 

Stage one: YAR! I knew it! When the easterlys first started a-pickin' up, an' bringin' bucketloads of rain with them, I knew it wouldn't be a good day fer me. Though I was fitter than fiddlesticks, an' more than ready to protect some eyeballs for a 9 mile time trial, me owner hardly even took me out of me case! Oh he took me out allright, and promptly switched out my lenses to the red ones, but he nigh wore me fer more than the twenty minutes of his dastardly warm up. Then, back in the case fer me -- he reached for his fancy-pants TT helmet with its integrated visor -- AND WON THE CURSED RACE! Think of it -- me in my case, and that scurvy TT helmet a-takin' all the credits. CURSES!

Stage two: CURSES AGAIN!! Damn you, twilight criterium in the rain! May ye drift to the bottom of the drink and die like the grimy bilge-rat you are! Me clear lenses hardly ever get to smell the sour stink of battle, and this seemed like a proper-fit time for them to draw swords and march toward the sound of the guns. So I suited up my clear young lads and readied my blade.
But NO! 'Twern't but two laps into the rain-soaked hell-beast when the grit an' the grime an' the spray slopped up my lenses, rend'ring them useless as a gudgeon without a pintle. Choosin' between water in the eyes and blindness, Sam chose water in the eyes (and a goodly amount of grit and grime). He plucked me off his head, and stowed me in-pocket for the remainder of the race. Mind ye, Sam's race was cut mighty short by those Canadian scallywags, who hit out so hard in the first laps as to shatter the field and send Sam out the back in a hurry. Hardly ten laps into the race, Sam pulled the plug -- along with two-thirds of the rest of the field. 

Stage three: CURSES THRICE OVER!!!!!! If there were ever a day of wet weather to rival Davey Jones last day at sea, this be it. The rain came down thicker than deck planks, an' the spray off the wheels felt like standing over the blow-hole of bowhead. I stayed in me case all the live long day. CURSES! Sam went off and took second on the stage, and wrapped up the omnium nice and tight -- while I sat in my quarters and stewed like a mutineer in the brig. Wenatchee Omnium, you'll rue the day....


Wednesday, May 11, 2011

KROGG WIN DIRT BAG DASH!!!

Boy oh boy, Krogg have big day in Idaho. Last weekend, Krogg race in race. Not normal race...this race DIRT BAG DASH! 


This first year for Dirt Bag Dash -- what good race! Race put on by JoyRide Cycles. THANKS JOYRIDE! Race start like this: 


THAT RIGHT! Dirt Bag Dash all on dirt road -- Krogg love. Why Krogg love dirt road? Because when Krogg push on pedals very hard.....KROGG SMASH!!!!!!!!! Krogg teammate Kai also love dirt road! Kai SMASH TOO!! So race start, and before long, KAI AND KROGG SMASH!!!!!! Another part of Dirt Bag Dash that Krogg and Kai love -- BEER! By time Krogg and Kai finish first lap of race, gap to next group on road bigger than gap between mammoth tusks, so Kai ask Krogg question "should we get beer now?" Krogg see no reason why not. So Krogg and Kai stop in feed zone and ask for beer, and race promoters give! Exergy cavemen drink nice cold beer, and then hurry back to bikes, just before next group on road catch. Krogg and Kai burp for a mile or two afterwards, but legs feel great! 


Kai smash dirt roads -- only dirt road smash Kai back! Kai get flat tire. Then Kai fix flat tire. Then Kai flat again! Then Kai fix flat again. Then Kai still finish 3rd. KAI STRONG CAVEMAN. 


Krogg no flat -- KROGG SMASH!!! 


Krogg WIN Dirt Bag Dash. Here podium. KROGG FIRST WIN OF SEASON!!!! 


Dirt Bag Dash also attract....you guess.....DIRTBAGS!!!! Others accuse Krogg of be dirt bag at various times in life, so this race perfect! Only one thing Krogg no plan on....bigger dirtier dirt bag than Krogg! There no words to describe the level of dirt bag achieved by John. Only photo show: 


Notice: John race in jean shorts. On single-speed. With Exergy cap. AND GREATEST FACIAL HAIR KNOWN TO MAN!


John easily win "Dirt Bag Award" for being best dirt bag. 
Congrats to John! 


Krogg win many bike races, but none so sweet as Dirt Bag Dash. DIRT BAGS FOREVER!

Friday, May 6, 2011

Sometimes, It's Just Not Up To You...

SOMETIMES YOU WAKE UP WANTING TO RIDE YOUR MOUNTAIN BIKE, BUT FIRST YOU HAVE TO PAY YOUR BILLS AND SKYPE YOUR GRANDMA SO YOU PUT YOUR BIKE RIDE OFF UNTIL THE AFTERNOON BECAUSE THOSE CLOUDS LOOK LIKE THEY'RE GOING TO BURN OFF LATER IN THE DAY ANYWAY AND GRANDMA DOESN'T REALLY LIKE HER COMPUTER SO SHE DOESN'T USE IT MUCH, WHICH MEANS YOU'D BETTER SKYPE HER WHILE SHE'S ONLINE, AND BESIDES IT STAYS LIGHT UNTIL LIKE 9PM IN BOISE THESE DAYS, SO YOU'LL GET TO RIDE YOUR MOUNTAIN BIKE FOR SURE....UNLESS....THOSE CLOUDS DON'T BURN OFF, AND INSTEAD START TO SPIT RAIN ONTO YOU, CALLING INTO QUESTION THE WHOLE POSSIBILITY OF A MOUNTAIN BIKE RIDE, UNTIL YOU ARE FINALLY CONVINCED IT WILL POUR RAIN ON YOU IF YOU DARE TAKE YOUR NEW MOUNTAIN BIKE ON THOSE TRAILS, LEAVING YOU NO CHOICE BUT TO CALL OFF THE WHOLE GODDAM THING AND INSTEAD TAKE YOURSELF OUT TO SEE THOR, WHICH IS GOING TO FRICKIN' ROCK, EVEN THOUGH YOU DIDN'T READ MUCH THOR WHEN YOU WERE A KID -- I MEAN, SURE, YOU'VE GOT A FEW OLD THOR ISSUES MIXED IN THAT GIGANTIC BOX OF COMICS COLLECTING DUST IN YOUR MOM'S ATTIC, BUT IT'S NOT LIKE YOU WERE AN AVID THOR READER OR ANYTHING, WHICH IS ENTIRELY BESIDE THE POINT (THE POINT BEING THAT THOR IS GOING TO FRICKIN' ROCK), AND IF NOBODY WILL GO SEE A SUPERHERO MOVIE WITH YOU, IT DOESN'T BOTHER YOU ONE BIT -- THOR, HERE I COME -- BY MYSELF IF NEED BE. 

FOLLOW SPEEDWEEK!!!

Ok. Shoutout time. The entire Team Exergy Speed Week hit-squad deserves some GliderBison love, so here we go:

CARLOS ALZATE gets the biggest and baddest shoutout of all. He's FRIGGIN LEADING Speed Week. Yes, you heard that right. Do you see this:
We call him "Hollywood" 


INDIVIDUAL OVERALL
Men
1. Carlos Alzate, Team Exergy – 944 pts
2. Luca Damiani, Kenda/5-Hour Energy – 928 pts
3. Hilton Clarke, UnitedHealthCare – 925 pts
4. Jake Keough, UnitedHealthCare – 909 pts
5. Andrew Dahlheim, Bissell – 834 pts

(complete points breakdown here.)

Yeah. Badass. Or, as they say in Colombia, vacano.



Next up: ERIC BARLEVAV!

Eric is sitting 7th overall right now, and has been consistent all week, snatching a 10th, a 5th, and a 4th so far. With a smile like that, I have no doubt that Eric is every bit as successful chatting up hotties after the race as he is sprinting for the money. Good luck this weekend Eric, both on and off the bike!



Next: BEN "BONE CRUSHER" CHADDOCK. Solid riding from the neo-pro! Ben, you make Whitman proud! Ben is sitting at 15th overall, and is really rising to the occasion, providing crucial assistance to Carlos and Barly all week.
Look at Ben CRUSH those bars!
Lastly REMI MCMANUS. Remi is showing us young whipper snappers a thing or two about how to GET IN TO SHAPE QUICK. I raced with Remi in his first race of the season, the 1/2 crit at Redlands (held at the same time as the Sunset Loop circuit race). That a month ago. Now Remi is slaying it at the front of Speed Week crits, helping our boys. Killer job Remi. Keep it up!
GET 'EM REMI!