Monday, September 20, 2010

Interbiiiike!

Interbike, you get ready. Krogg COMING. Krogg plan to make this best trip to Vegas ever. After all, Vegas is perfect place for caveman: all you can eat buffets, lots of bright flashy lights (caveman love flashy lights!), and zillions of ways to spend money. Wait. That last one not right -- Krogg hate spend money.


Anyway.


Krogg have mixed agenda. Here some things Krogg hope to do while at Interbike: 


1: Thank Sponsors
Krogg have so many sponsors to thank! Sponsors like Blue Bikes and Cole Wheels make Krogg's season possible. Krogg excited for opportunity to thank sponsors in person. Krogg also glad that all sponsors gather in one spot to make thanking easy. 


2: Work Booth for Cole
Krogg also probably spend time working at Cole wheels booth. Krogg help explain why Cole wheels best wheels on planet! Krogg say things like: "want to go fast? try wheel. Want to go REALLY fast? Try COLE wheel!!" Krogg all too happy to spend time at Cole booth -- after all, Cole wheels literally carried Krogg to victory!


3: Schmooze 
If there one thing Krogg good at, it schmoozing. Krogg plan on shaking hands 'til grip-strength start to fail. Krogg also hope to sweet talk way onto pro team. Yes sir, Krogg have foolproof plan: Krogg put ruffies in the martini of every team director at Interbike. When directors wake up next morning, Krogg already signed contract! By end of weekend, Krogg hope to be racing on at least 12 different pro teams, and making 12 million euros. What could go wrong?! Then Krogg see the movie The Hangover, and Krogg realize that, indeed, great deal can go wrong when you feed people ruffies in Vegas. 


Then Krogg watch other movie called Inception. This give Krogg even BETTER idea! What if Krogg hack into the dreams of team directors, have very complicated series of shootouts, snowmobile chases, and zero-gravity fist fights, then spend whole lifetime growing old in dreamland -- all so Krogg can plant tiny shard of a shred of a seed of an idea in team directors minds: sign Krogg for 2011. Krogg pretty sure this plan will work....


...but then Krogg realize that whole idea came to Krogg in one giant dream! Technology for hacking into dreams not even exist yet. Besides, odds are, team directors have pretty spooky dreams.  So Krogg have to do things old fashioned way: with smiles, handshakes, and resumes. Good luck Krogg. You'll need it! 

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