Monday, August 4, 2008

TRAVESTY!!!!!

CORRECTIONS FROM DANIELLE:
1. The cookies were made on Thursday night....so you woke up on Friday to the torture (not Wednesday silly).

2. They were not for my co-workers, but for a friends BF who's bday party I was so happily bailing on.

and 3. When you called to beg for a cookie, I meant that you each could have one, ha!!!!!!! And to think you were so nice to as to share with each other ;)




NO MAN SHOULD HAVE TO LIVE IN THESE CONDITIONS!!!! THIS SURELY CROSSES THE LINE -- CRUEL AND UNUSUAL PUNISHMENTS I SAY, CRUEL AND UNUSUAL!!!!

Keep in mind, this nearly a week ago, and I'm only now able to write about this awful, awful event.

When we awoke last Wednesday, Alan and I were greeted by the following scene laid out upon our kitchen table:"Awh fuck yeah," I thought, as my eyes feasted upon the chocolate/marshmallow/peanut butter wonderment, my salivary glands unusually active so soon after waking up. The only problem I had with the whole scene was which goody to try first.

As my greedy paw reached for a cookie, "WAIT --" I heard from behind me, "Danielle said we can't eat any of those.....they're for her co-workers."

ALAN, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? SHE JUST LEFT THEM HERE FOR US TO STARE AT ALL DAY????

Yep.

So stare we did. In case you can't tell what's going on here -- that would be a chocolate cookie, topped with a melted marshmallow, iced with rich a rich chocolate frosting.
And here we have some chocolate, peanut butter, oatmeal no-bake bars. Mercy.It was shear torture. After 7 hours of staring, we called Danielle at work and begged. "Puh-puh-puh-please can we have a cookie," we whined, "or we'll set your room on fire, ok?". She relented, and said that we could eat ONE, and only one cookie. So, we chose the largest specimen, and carefully cut it in half. Here's the cross section (and yes, it was as good as it looked -- Danielle has some lucky fuckin' co-workers, I'll tell you what!):
She's got some lucky fuckin' housemates too...

1 comment:

the handler said...

Danielle here. Just want to clear up a little of your mumbo-jumbo....you may have to post a revision :)

1. The cookies were made on Thursday night....so you woke up on Friday to the torture (not Wednesday silly).

2. They were not for my co-workers, but for a friends BF who's bday party I was so happily bailing on.

and 3. When you called to beg for a cookie, I meant that you each could have one, ha!!!!!!! And to think you were so nice to as to share with each other ;)